“If you are a runner whose periods have become lighter or stopped, consider dropping your mileage and visiting your GP”
As I pounded on the cross trainer at the gym, sweat running down my face, I took a double take as I read the above advice in my first issue of Women’s Running. I’d bought the magazine for the half marathon advice, I was so nervous about failing and letting everyone down.
That’s what ran through my head with each stride taken during earlier and earlier runs in the morning. Pushing myself up killer hills, feeling cross if I managed less than six miles. I wanted to run the half marathon, I wanted so much for my loved ones to be proud of me.
When my periods stopped, I put it down to stress, a change in diet (I dropped chocolate), the fact I was running. I wasn’t concerned, after all, I wasn’t trying to get pregnant and mother nature’s monthly ‘gift’ is hardly a bundle of joy.
I read that advice and simply thought “it’s such a common thing they’ve put it in a magazine”. It didn’t occur to me that my body was screaming at me to ease off, that I was simply doing too much on too little.
Then the months rolled on. My weight didn’t change -I really want to stress that I was always a healthy weight - but my body did, curves became muscles and the shape of my face changed. I became afraid of eating a potato unless it “undid my good work”.
I ran the half marathon under my time goal of two hours and decided to let my body recover, to gain weight, get more of a sensible mindset to exercise and feel like a woman again.
Running became replaced with walking, breakfast tripled in size. Cake and halva were part of my daily menu, yoga counted as the exercise for the day and the pounds started adding back on.
But my periods didn’t return. Months went by and honestly, I was a horrible mess, altering between gorging myself to gain, feeling guilty that I had, reverting back to my previous meals. Stepping on the scales was a horrible experience – guilt if the number stayed the same or had dropped, guilt if it had risen.
I can’t tell you exactly what pushed me out of that cycle, I simply forgot to weigh myself one day and stopped obsessing over it.
What changed:
- Lots of almond butter. As in spoonfuls straight from the jar, three with breakfast each morning
- Cacao nibs
- A daily omega 3, 6 and 9 supplement
- At least half an avocado a day
- Sweet potato with my evening meal, with feta and coconut oil drizzled on top
- Fuelling before exercise with a snack of at least 200 calories
- Very little running
- Yoga and walking
- Early nights and sleeping in at the weekend
After six months I started getting really awful mood swings. I’m a positive, happy person but had episodes of screaming on the floor, weeping for hours, feeling hideous. I was a treat for James, I can tell you!
Then one day, my period came back.
I can’t tell you how happy I was, how I strutted round feeling a million dollars. It was a painful battle but I had won, working with my body instead of against it.
I feel like we are constantly told we are not doing enough, how we can slim down, how we can lose weight, tone up, lose our “wobbly bits”. I’m not saying we should all become obese but isn’t a little softness what makes us feminine?
Yes I have gained weight, yes my clothes are tighter, some don’t fit round my bum and hips in an appropriate way any more (French Connection pencil skirt, I’m thinking of you!). I can’t lie and say that makes me feel great, some days I really struggle. In a society where less is more when it comes to weight, those extra pounds sometimes play on my mind.
But I feel fit, healthy and so much stronger than I did. I don’t run very often but when I do, I’m faster. I can go for longer. I can lift weights. I’m not afraid of food any more.
Most importantly for me, I’m a woman and my body is in harmony again.
* I haven’t really explained what HA is or why it occurs so please check out these wonderful ladies’ blogs. Their experiences and advice were a crucial source of information and advice for me.
Courtney, Sweet Tooth Sweet Life
Katie, Healthy Diva Eats
Ashley, My Food n Fitness Diaries
Jessie, Jessie Loves To Run
This is a great post. Thank you for sharing your experiences. Sometimes I feel myself thinking about food as “good” or “bad,” but I catch myself before it gets out of hand. I love food, and I love food that isn’t necessarily good for me, but I always make sure I eat plenty of fruits and veggies, so I know I shouldn’t worry because I’m not going to gain too much weight. I have a stomach, and I’m darn proud of it!
Thank you so much Amanda, I was so nervous about writing it so your support means so much. Food is there to be enjoyed, not counted or resented – just wish it hadn’t taken me so long to realise it! Love your attitude to your stomach, I have thighs but they are strong, powerful and let me do all the crazy things I want!
hey lady,
I had no idea you struggled with this. I went through the same thing, lost my period for six years yes six years due to my disorder which was a lot more entrenched than yours was. it took a lot of hard work to get it back, six months off running, an eye opening experience, enjoying food again, and embracing a female figure. I have to say though I am way happier with my period and proud of the hard work I put in. just know you are not alone at all. I give you credit for doing it all by yourself. you are a freaking rock star.
Thank you so much Alex, I had no idea you went through it either! Six years is such a long time, must have been horrendous for you – six months was bad enough for me! Well done for working so blooming hard and getting it back, an amazing achievement. You’re pretty awesome yourself
Love, love, love this post. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much!
Oh my word. I think you may have given me a bit more inspiration for my masters diss! Glad that things are back to normal. I’ve always been lucky and not had any issues with my cycle but girls I trained with when I was a teenager often had cessation of their periods. It’s something that needs sorting as it really impacts on our health long term.
Glad to be of service! I think it needs to be much more publicised, I had no idea how important it was to get it back (mentally and physically).
There’s a condition called female triad syndrome which isn’t known about in recreational circles. Usually effects young elite women and dancers. It’s to do with disordered eating and menstrual cycle, there’s an imbalance in energy in and energy out. Can make us more vulnerable to illness and injury. Fuel is so important for exercise but it’s so easy to get an imbalance.
I’d never heard of that but it is really interesting. It annoys me when people say you have to burn more calories than you eat, but don’t explain that you burn them by being alive as well!
You are so right, curves and a ‘bit of squidge’ is definitely what makes us women, and it is SO attractive! Glad you managed to get your body back to optimum condition!
Thanks very much Ffion – I love that phrase ‘a bit of squidge’!!
There are quite a few people out there having issues with their periods and it being connected to their diets. I’m so glad that you have got everything under control.
Thanks Jemma, I was amazed when I saw how many others were affected!
Great post, I’ve had the same issues in the past and I do still miss periods when my montly running increases, although since doing a marathon in October my mileage has dropped and they have settled back down. I think so many people go through this. Loving your almond butter love
Thanks Lauren. AB is the best!
Glad you have your issues sorted now- I think it is important to talk about them as I am sure a lot of people have not heard of this sort of thing, but as you show a lot of people actually go through it.
Thank you so much, so many other people do seem to go through it – I was really surprised when I started researching it for advice!
<3 <3 <3 LOVE this post! Absolutely fantastic and I am so happy that your body has healed. I can see so much of my own journey in this post – you have given me hope! I've actually just had some blood test results back that show my hormones are in a normal range again. Hoping its just a matter of time now! Oh and you look gorgeous in that pic!
Thank you so much Laura. I’m so happy to hear that your hormones are back to normal, hopefully you’ll start seeing the signs that they are soon! Thanks very much, I fear it will be ages before I can wear that dress again given our weather!
Oh hunnie, I wish there was a LOVE button on this post! I am so proud of you for sharing your story with the blog world. I know how hard it must have been, but just know you are now an inspiration to so many people <3 <3 Continue living your life & being the healthiest you can be. I just adore you girl!!
Aww thank you so much Jessie, you are wonderful and it helped so much having you go through this at the same time. I can’t wait for your body to fully heal too
. It was massively scary but glad I did. You’re so lovely Jessie!
Thanks so much for sharing this, hun. I can’t imagine it was easy.
I’m so glad you have stressed that depriving our bodies of food and over exercising can not always be good for us. We’re told to eat less and move to more to lose weight and be healthy. And yes, that does work to an extent. But we can over do it. And I did. I was scared of fat, scared of bread and many other foods. I’d exercise 5-6 times a week, eat super clean and healthy but not lose anymore weight, which was frustrating as it was what I wanted to do. So I decided to change things up. I introduced more healthy fats, ate a little more and didn’t go so crazy on my workouts and just focused on doing exercise that I enjoy (yoga and horse riding mainly) and low and behold the weight has started to come off again. I’ve lost almost 5lbs since Jan
.
My periods have always been very irregular. I can go months without having one. This isn’t unusual for me. The pill I’m on (the one hormone pill) doesn’t help with my irregularity but I can’t go on the two hormone pill because of my migraines. I often get the cravings and PMS of a period but don’t actually have one. Then I go through months of having periods every 4 weeks. But that’s just the way my body is.
Thanks Nikki. What you say is so true – it is so hard to find and maintain a healthy balance. I’m so glad that you have found it, horse riding and yoga are awesome workouts and so much fun. I’ve found working with my body rather than forcing it to do things that it doesn’t like is best – even if it does mean actually resting and pushing my comfort zones when it comes to food. I know exactly what you mean about cravings and PMS but no period, it’s a really odd experience!
I really needed to read this
You are such a strong person and I applaud you for the progress you’ve made! Keep up the good work!
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